One thing that has stood out to me when thinking about communication is how I don't communicate the same with everyone I interact with. Thinking about this with family systems theory, I think it is because of the different roles I have in different relationships and the hierarchies in place. With my parents I don't always communicate as assertively as I do with other people, because even if we disagree I know that if I press my point too much it will just result in a fight.
Another reason my communication styles are different in different relationships probably has to do with the fact that I tend to have more of a validating approach to communicating. I have dated conflict-avoiding people in the past, and we did not have good communication. When I wanted to talk, they were trying to avoid the topic. I have noticed that when I disagree with some of my volatile friends I am more hesitant to say something, because I know that they will take the argument to a level that is higher in anger than I'm willing to go. Luckily, my partner now is also validating, and so far we have been able to have very positive conflict resolution when conflicts due arise.
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