A Strong Family

When anyone mentioned the words "strong family" before, I had always thought of my childhood. Then, last week in class, we were given a handout about strong and healthy families. I was reading over the handout, and it seemed that a lot of the criteria listed did not exist for my family. I was one of three children of a single father, and he was away at work a lot, so we didn't spend too much time together as a family. We were often presented with empty promises, and vacations that would not exist. At some sports games and piano recitals, I wouldn't see my dad sitting with the rest of the parents, but I always knew that he would rather be supporting me in my interests, than stuck at a mundane job. We never were the typical affectionate family that hugged and kissed each other. I only remember going to church once with my dad. And it seemed that if there was a problem within the household, everyone ignored it and it eventually went away.
I left class wondering if I had a strong family after all. I always knew what was expected of me, and I always knew that my dad was proud of everything I did. Though we didn't hug each other often to express how much we loved each other, we all knew that we cared for one another. I guess what I learned from this experience is that every family functions differently, and just because you can't check off half of the list, doesn't mean that you aren't a strong family.
As I go into my professional life working with families, I need to keep in mind that some families aren't able to spend a lot of time with each other. Some families don't show affection in the way of hugs and kisses. And not all families deal with conflicts and problems the same way. I think that if the family thinks that they function well and are strong, then they are probably right. No one can measure exactly how strong a family is, unless you are a part of that family. It is easy to judge a book by the cover, but digging into it a little further will shed some interesting insight on just how healthy a family can be without checking off criteria from a list.